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Showing posts from October, 2018

HISTORY OF WORLD (100,000 BCE - 20,000 BCE)

bce stands for bit coin extreme speaking of extreme, i spent an extreme amount of time researching history and satan the bible so this will be extremlt acreate. IT ALL STARTED LIKE a bunch YEARS AGO 100,000 BCE at first, it was dark, then, someone turned on the lights. the whole universe was like omg finally - universe so like out of the light came many a thing first came jeff, the god of jeff he had a pretty cool name and did fortnite dances then Clefffffff, god of insects. nobody likes him and potato, god of food. hes racist towards the irish so nobody likes him either you'll see oh and dont forget god, the god of finland. jk hes not real jeff was like i need house -jeff so he made an earth. then cleff was like we need a huge lamp - cleffffff forshadowing then the sun so the earth circled the sun in space. it was real boring bc the earth was also a fireball rn so they needed something to look at lets make a bunch of other suns to make cool pic

The history of the Frisbee

if it wasnt alreayd obvois the frisbee is the most ultimate weapon. it feels no pain. for instance, if you throw a frisbee at a 4 year old, the frisbee wont cry. but if you throw a 4 year old at another 4 year old, they both cry. peasents i say xDDDDD anyways ive commited like a bazillion klils in minecraft hunger games using a frissbeee so you aleady know its the most EPIC weapon lol I need to explain the hidstroy so u guys can ace your histroy test THE STORRY  OF THE FRISBWEEE there was a man by the name of amazon prime. he was in his prime, and he was a a,m pf the amazon. out there, it was dog eat dog, person eat dog, pineapple eat dog, thjere was a lot of dogs. the rainforest wasnt there yet though it was just a plain bc the trees were still growing lol the trees were so beautiful in that they weren't there just like your dad anyways he was out in the fields gathering corn gorewn by the ancient natives. ill tell there story later since the story is boring but noth

ferret combat (PORT 3)

The art of fighting with a ferret is truly ae inspiring. one must practice both the combat and defensive forms of the use of such a formiddable weapon. the ferret has many pros and cons to its usgage. PROES cheese male nazis women nazis nazis in general budgies jk those r the things you hit with a ferret ACTUAL PROCES - ez to rob nazis with - heckboi deflector - coconut slapper - cheese slapper - ferret slapper - child slapper (ONLY NAZI CHILDREN) - potato cream - yeet! BOO HAHAHAHAHAHHA SPOOKED YOU LOLOLOLOLOLOL conOONONONS - ferret - expensive - need to feed it - pokemon go to the polls so lets get into usage the number one usage is for beating cheese with a ferret for satanic rituals   fun. christian values! guys dont forget to never break the law and always treat animals with respect. now lets get into illegally disrespecting feretrs beating cheese is truly an art. it can work as a supplement to budgie liver, however imo its like comparing dust

How to get friends (PRAT 2)

THIS ONE IS PG 13 KIDDOS OMG CLICKBAITED!! i know that you only read my blog becaus eryou hhave nobody to talk to and to be honest i only write this because nobody talks to me but thats besides the point im in brazil anyways xddddDDDD so how has your day beem jk as you already knoe i coudldnt care less i have better things to deal with liek cryiong and molding ice cream out of the remains of cats. the cats taste good. they remind me of my friends, in that they are dead. xdddddd yeet!' couple things 1. Beating chese wit a fereeret coming soon 1. yeet povvers coming soon 1. my social life coming soon never 2. yeet! 3. new url: bc the old one was hard to remember ( cactuschairs.blogspot.com ) 4. new icon bc a heart is for pansies hehehehe  7 oh about that email she emailed me about burning her house down and i replied with your not god lolololol then sahe replied with what and i said no and then i sent a bullet through my screen to break her window and scare her xdddddD

How to god be is yes (PART 1)

you might be asking, Onion juice, you really did it this time. you found the DUMB COOLEST title evr! and your wrong your always wrong your mother doesnt love you get out right now you loser so uh today ima show u how to get magical super powers. you will frist ned to learn how to juice your oninos, and if you dont know how to do that, your a faliure. yo h need to learn that if you plan on doing anything with your life you also need to know how to beat cheese with a ferret and also how to murder without being caught as well as juicing pizza. i will learn you a thing or two about the murder thing bc learning that is just a part of life. heck the police am i right. yeet! FIRZT - MURDER alright u wanna learn how to kill? first you need a plan. my first murder was this tax collector bc he cant collect taxes if hes dead lol. here was my plan 1. give him taxes 2. not actually taxes 3. i planted a spider 4. the spider scares him 5. he crashes into someones house 6. not actually