Skip to main content

yo i straight up got sent to hell!

sorry fam your boui had to restaert the entropy machine anyways ur boi lowkey highkey was walking down the street when a homeless man pulled up on me. you know my immediate reacton is to pull out my woild war 2 maxim machine gun but mans was like

YO CHILLAX DUDE

and i was like holup your poor and your not running away? double whammy so you already know i pulled out my second worl war 2 maxim macine gun.  like yikes man if he aint finna dash now ima have to mug him OH WAIT HES POOR

so we kinda just stared at each other quietly and then he was like

jesus why did i create you anyways 1v1 me checkers kid

and i was like hol up is you my father?

and then he was all like uh no lmao

kk now that that had been settled i straight up went full kaio-ken on him like 4th gear python form like avatar state i went full try hard i was lik,e RHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe

you already know your boy straight up LOST so hard like i got like 2 of his pieces he got like all of mine and i was cheating i had some backups in my pocket like 40 of em he got those too then i tried to burn the board but this man pulled out a cross so you already know i had to back down then he was like

YOU ARE NOT WORTHY! IF THE HORSEMEN CANNOOT VANQUISH YOU I WILL and i straight up like no chill no cap no lies man got sent to hell


i was like bruv

so here i was akwardle standing in line with people goin up to the customs like

what brings you to hell?

straight up kicked a grandma

WEAK AMIRITE!!! then this other guy was like

i robbed 3 banks, set a village on fire, and spilled nails in an ice rink

BRUV, THATS ONLI LIKE 2 ENTIRE SINS! GO GIVE THE CHURCH MONEY OR SOMETHING THEYLL LET IT SLIDE

i called bo ugly

ok so heres where we draw the line anyways it was my turn

onion juice? didn she break up wif you?

a w k w a r d amirite? (incase you dont remember, your a fake fan. im suprised your not in this line) (jk) (read how to ctrl-z satan) (you dont have to) (but like you should)

kk then i was like uh i got sent here by a homeless man

and then the customs lady was like lmao ok buddy and shanked me

here we go again bois

so i woke up as usual in my hell-cell. to be fair, they've upgraded since last time, as the tv on the wall is now slightly more crooked than before. turning it on, they now have the other minions movies. audio only plays out of one speaker, but sometimes the other if you arent paying attention. the walls are all slightly wet, and all the socks are soaked. the only shoe-wear are sandals, and all the water is lukewarm. the bed is a twin size, but its slightly off the wall, so your blanket will fall off and get stuck in the crease. the light flickers randomly, and the entropy machine is painted an ugly vanta-black. at least the eyes in the corner are red this time. this is hell.

once i got used to being back here i knew i should probably think about how im gonna escape. ive made enough sacrificies so that at this point, the entropy machine doesnt need blood to restart. while this sounds ok, im actually t r y i n  to get into limbo as its wayyy easier to warp in an out of. its limbo after all.

so i gave in and fought the eyes to lower the rooms temperature to 89 degrees. this messes with the entropy machine blablabla heat death woopty doo im in limbo. yaaaaaaay. its not like my bedroom is literally across that river. cant see the river? sorry, not my fault you cant see in the eternal darkness in limbo. i come here so often my eyes have acclimatered to the derkness. i can just see normally now. ya'know, the big floating heads are way more scay when you can actually seee them.

anyways i just walked over to my bedroom and opened the trapdoor, and poof, im in my recording room again. and that folks, is the story of my trip to hell. as always when im not lazee, i will include a pictur of limbo and another picture of limbo. hope you enjoyed the post, and if you didnt, your lying. new  onion juice video as soon as i figure out how to turn on my computer. it turnedo off bc i was away for a couple seconds so  i prob gotta ask the cia agent

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

HISTORY OF WORLD (100,000 BCE - 20,000 BCE)

bce stands for bit coin extreme speaking of extreme, i spent an extreme amount of time researching history and satan the bible so this will be extremlt acreate. IT ALL STARTED LIKE a bunch YEARS AGO 100,000 BCE at first, it was dark, then, someone turned on the lights. the whole universe was like omg finally - universe so like out of the light came many a thing first came jeff, the god of jeff he had a pretty cool name and did fortnite dances then Clefffffff, god of insects. nobody likes him and potato, god of food. hes racist towards the irish so nobody likes him either you'll see oh and dont forget god, the god of finland. jk hes not real jeff was like i need house -jeff so he made an earth. then cleff was like we need a huge lamp - cleffffff forshadowing then the sun so the earth circled the sun in space. it was real boring bc the earth was also a fireball rn so they needed something to look at lets make a bunch of other s...
3 comments
Read more

Science results + how to milk pidgeons

What is up gois todae i'm gonna lern u a thin or 2 ab som of the stuff i laerned  from studying on beluger wahales. They look like dolphins They smell like dolphins They are basically fat ugly stupid dolpins I don't like belugers Anyways through sceienc i turned a parakeet into a parrot adn then into a pidgeon so all in all good experiment. I threw the belugers into the ocean so they will prob be fine. They have my number if they need anything but i'm not gonna respond lol So once i got these pidgeons i decided i needed to do sometihing with them. I went on my laptop and glooged Can you milk a pidgon? I got many seach results. In clonclusion, yes, you, can,milk,them. So i yeet my kenife into the pidgeon and got out those nice bird juices I have to say it goes well with baby parakeet pancakes sometimes ok most of the times ok every times the pidgons die but natural selection they shouldnt have died lol anyways goios brazil is real ...
3 comments
Read more

New year, new me!

Hey guys! It is your boy, Onion Juice, and today I will be talking about a few of my new year's traditions, as well as my resolutions. This year, I have a few things I would like to accomplish. - Check my grammar before posting to my oh-so-glorious blog. - Get rid of my girlfriend - Be friends with Shawp again. - Find my father   Get rid of my girlfriend. - Get rid of my girlfriend Is that everything Every new years, I spend the night by myself on a hill. However, My girlfriend is incapable of leaving me, so I spent it with her. I love to enjoy the silence when the clock strikes 12, yet I had to hear her ear piercing screech that just NEVER STOPS IT NEVER STOPSS IT NEV ER STOIPS PLEASSE JUSETE FU Don't know what came over me anyways if you haven notised yet i got away from the skeleton. Turns out that skeletons are incapable of feeling emotion and all i had to do was make out wif it in ordeer to best it within combat. instantly vaporised. wish the sa...
Post a Comment
Read more